Sunday, July 22, 2007

dreaming series 4

i was sitting with you on top of my great grandmother's toyota corona. the car was in the garage of my ancestral home in downtown los banos. it was demolished a long time ago,now a strip mall.

i knew that we were in our present age despite the very old and forgotten setting. at one time in my dream i was wearing that transformers t-shirt i got right after i saw the movie last weekend. i know that somehow it was the present because i wore my hair long and i was hiding my tattoo from you.

i was asking you how your trip was. you told me stories like you used to. we stole a few kisses in between stories.


i woke up with a start. the tears came again. hot and searing.


a few minutes after this, you texted me.

you just back from the philippines, you said. thought you'd let me know.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

serendipity


this morning i met up with c to visit chinatown for sunday dimsum and canal street shopping (wink wink). after a satisfying brunch and an equally satisfying retail therapy, we got our asses back to nj by 12:30.

i got back to the apartment, hung-out for a while, showered and got myself back to the city to meet up with r. r was a fellow volunteer for this year's gay pride march in nyc. he was so sweet to wait for me in front of the cruise ship so i won't feel so out of place. i chatted with r(and the some of the crew) over chicken empanadas and a cosmopolitan. i did the signature joffin q and q and found out a bit more about r. after i found out that the cruise would finish by 10:30 pm, i decided to skip the cruise since i was already feeling seasick. luckily, g had the same idea in mind because he is so exhausted after a day of tennis. i asked g if i can walk with him back to the subway station.

g was one of the first friendly faces who spoke to me during the parade. he had an easygoing air about him. he is tall, well-dressed and he is very pleasant. at first i thought he was korean. he thought i was latina. he nudged me on the shoulder and quipped, "i didn't know you smoked!" and we hit it off right away.

back to today, g and i had the usual small talk. on our way to the subway station somewhere in the west village, i recognized a south east asian fusion bistro that i went to with a friend a few years back. he asked if i felt like having a bite to eat.

and what do you know?! over dinner of lechon kawali,lumpiang shanghai and thai iced tea, we exchanged stories of our lives -- almost mirror images of each other. he offered me a couch in his apartment. i offered him my ovaries. i knew i had made another wonderful friend for keeps. we talked about his mom, his past relationship, the opera, wagner, mozart, my past relationship, the MOMA. we scheduled a museum visit for our next date.

he rode the subway with me all the way to port authority.

i got to port authority a little after 10 pm. the bus that took me home was at 11 pm. i sat there patiently mulling over the events that took place this evening.

God has a way of putting people together.

i never had a gay boyfriend in college, but boy are they coming into my life in just the right time.

tattoo

so i got my tattoo done last week. i went to sacred tattoo in downtown nyc. it's a popular tattoo shop in the city with more than 30 years in the biz. matt adams was my tattoo artist. he specializes in japanese inspired tattoos. he's my age and muy cool. he has done several pieces that i really like. check out his website

back in college, i thought of getting a tattoo. i wanted it to be a trail of red ladybugs climbing my back. i thought that was cute. but the "rational/conservative" voice in me warned against it. what if decades from now i find myself in a nursing home with early dementia? i look myself in the mirror and find bugs crawling from my ass up to my back?! tragedy i tell you.

so i cancelled my plans of getting a tattoo. friends got theirs. briggs got one on her ankle. edong just got one on his arm. charly has one by her pelvis. jerrold has little triangular thingies on his knuckles.

more than a decade later , at this turning point in my life, the thought popped in my head again.

during the drunken hours of my birthday eve, i entertained the idea and asked my friend lubs what she would think if i get one. she was thrilled by the idea and admitted that she wanted to get one herself. she even suggested we get one together before i ride back to nj, sort of a birthday present to myself.

and so, the idea simmered in my head. i researched tattoo websites and read on FAQs on how painful it may be. finally, on july 7 i planned a trip to the city to sacred tattoo. alas, i did not get my tattoo on that auspicious day because matt was too tired. i did not want to risk getting a tattoo from an overworked artist. no. i can wait. i scheduled my session for the following day.

i was at sacred tattoo a few minutes before our appointed time. matt and i brainstormed on what tattoo i had wanted. and this is how it looks like.




the session took almost two hours with three mini breaks. i brought along a graphic novel to keep my mind off the whirring needles and of course, the pain. matt was a very cool guy. we listened to jam music and we talked in between. did it hurt? yes, but not as painful as i have anticipated. did it hurt? this kind of pain is nothing to the one inflicted in my heart.

and so, by dusk i sauntered out of sacred tattoo feeling like a big girl and a whole new person. my friend from blogging berks put it best. it is time to let my ankh bearing phoenix fly unfettered.

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

tattoo

the idea of inking myself is getting more and more appealing to me. i found me a place in downtown nyc. it's a only a matter of when i will have it done that needs to be decided upon.

in testament to my new life i choose to put a phoenix on my back. i am still a bit squeamish about the pain and the needles, but what of it... it'll pass.

happy independence day.