just another day in the edd box

it is an understatement to say that it is a tough job to teach special ed kids. most of special ed kids are seen as trouble makers. it takes a lot of will and heart to begin and finish each school day with one's sanity intact.

there had been days when i was this close to tears; tears of frustration at how unkind my kids can be to each other. their unkindness towards me, i have learned to understand, but sometimes i have my weak moments.

part of being a special ed teacher is attending team meetings to discuss each student's educational plans and recommendations for the next school year. this morning, i attended one such meeting and the student is one of my first period boys, who we will call speedy.

unfortunately, the reports from the psychologist and other teachers were not very rosy. speedy still needs to work harder on his work and study habits.speedy has ADHD. he is a few years behind in terms of reading and comprehension skills. and as much as i recognize his excellent effort in class, i do not think it will be for his best interest to join a mainstream class next year.

i sat beside speedy as we listened to various reports and test results. i saw his jaw tensed. his eyes were a bit teary, i know from anger. i knew it hurt him to hear these reports, but he has to know and he needs to address them, with our help of course. for a moment there, i wanted to hold his hand and tell him he's going to be okay. i felt sad for him. in a way i felt i also failed him.


as sad as i was, i felt so blessed to be a teacher to these kids. some teachers and students misunderstand them most of the time, sometimes even i do not understand them. one thing i know though, i have a job to do here in high school special ed english. and even though my kids drive me crazy, there are days when all the bad things that happen in class can disappear from my mind.


here's a new "hallmark" moment ...

after that meeting, i had a class. freshman english. B1 and B2 are always late. always. for a class of 5 kids, missing 2 by the final bell is very noticeable. in short, i've had it with these two. of course they made a scene. B1, who i know likes me as a teacher suddenly turned nasty to me. exasperated as i was, i tried not to make a scene in the hallway as i told them to get out of the classroom and go with me to the dean's office. a couple of my sophomores, comedy, grumpy and flappy, who of course were hanging out in the hallways, came to my rescue and told off B1 and B2.

comedy : yo, why you talkin' to my teacher like that yo?!
grumpy : you guys better start treatin' her right before we @*&$ you up!
comedy : stop doing that!
flappy : why are you guys always giving her a hard time?

(slightly embarrassed to be told off by their older "brothers" in the edd box, B1 and B2 lumbered out of the classroom, muttering in resignation)

and these three are the same three who sometimes claim they hate me or they hate my class.

sigh.