Thursday, December 18, 2008

just keep swimming

wow, 'tis been a while.

the only reason that keeps me from writing on this blog is my school.

the past few days i feel i am more of a student than i am of a teacher. honestly, i remember what i have to do for "work" when i'm the shower, i'll have one of those lit light bulb moments of what i can possibly do with my students today to keep them from killing each other.

as a tutor, i've been very busy as well. with 2 of my kids having their midterms this week, they literally want me to study w/ them at any time that i am free.

it is tiring to study, stressful at work because my big kids are already in holiday mode.

my tutees always energize me. i am so blessed to have this unique opportunity to spend time with V, R and O. Just amazing how smart and thoughtful they are. i love their moms. they continue to do a good job at raising them. i am deeply inspired to be moms like them -- someday when God blesses me with my own child.

Z spent his birthday in a quiet fashion. bless him for keeping me focused and relzed with my school work. we went to my neighborhood japanese restaurant where he drank a huge ass 34 oz. mug/pitcher of sapporo beer.

he got me an exercise thingy that anchors on the door frame. it's called iron gym. it's like a monkey bar. pretty hard to do, but nice to hang once in while as i typed away, yet another paper.

i'm gonna get ready for gym now. will be back to report maybe tomorrow.

you all have a wonderful day and God bless you.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Monday, December 1, 2008

disyembre na

*ikatlong buwan ko na sa grad school, at wala pa rin akong ideya tungkol sa thesis ko.

* malapit nang mag-isang taon mula ng nagbukas loob ako sa Diyos at araw raw nagdarsal na sana maging mabait na ako.

* malapit na ang kaarawan ni pilar, moonshine, mahal, at ni eva.

* dadagsa ang balakubak mula sa langit. ihahanda ko na ang aking pala at botas.

* lilipad ako papunta sa europa, por de beri pers taym.

* sana huwag akong maligaw at maiwanan ng eroplano ko.

* hahasain ko na ang aking charades skill.

* i-eempake ko na ang aking grass skirt at palayok ng tinola.

* nah. i'll just be myself. i'm sure it will be okay.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

noo-ni-noo-ni-noo

  just a quick one.

  Z gifted me wth a czech phrase book.

  for christmas.

  with his family.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

i gedit

i really do.

i was on the phone with my mom last night, letting her know of my plan to visit Z's family and spending Christmas with them.

whew.

M's trip, it seems, have put so many things in perspective.

i'm ready.

hopeful.

excited.

but most of all,

thankful for all the blessings God has given me.

Yes Lord, I get it.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

a little bit of black

it seems timely that the topic of this post happened this historic day.

i've been having trouble staying awake at night.  usually, i would have dinner and then i almost immediately fall asleep.  i would intend to nap for a few hours and wake up around midnight and resume reading.  i would wake up at 3am, go to the gym by 5:15 and prep for another workday.

in short, i have been unsuccessful with my mission.

and so i asked a couple of my kids on how to stay up at night.

here's how that conversation went :

me :  guys, do you have any tips on how to stay up late?
B :  why?
me :  because after dinner, all i do is sleep.
M  :  so?
me:  i need to study.  what happens is, right after i eat, i would fall asleep.
B  :  you got niggavitis?
me :  what?
B  :  you got niggavitis.   a black people sickness. we eat a lot, then it's ovah.  we out.
        you got a little bit of black in you, ms. b.

me :  too speechless

not that this gives them a pass, but my kids are black.

did i tell you i love my job? 
  

Friday, October 31, 2008

suplada


I am not a touchy feely type of person. I am not averse to PDA per se.  scratch that, i think i am, but this does not mean i am cold and unfeeling.  I just feel shy or uncomfortable with certain body cues.

Working in the high school, I've noticed, to my slight dismay, that youngsters hug and kiss each other as casually as we Filipinos raise our eyebrows as a form of greeting.  

Some of my former students, mostly boys, like to hug me.  sigh.  I did not want to give them the impression that I am averse to them, but  I just don't think it is appropriate for a student to hug his teacher, especialy at their age.  I don't mind hugging my pre-school students, but these "boys"  are a different story.  Not that I think they mean anything wrong, I just think it is inappropriate.  

But how do you tell them not to hug you without hurting their feelings?  Apparently, I didn't have to.  My face said it all.  One of them  said I look like I am in pain.  One of them, got miffed, saying he doesn't hug all his teachers, so I said, don't make me an exception."  He did not like that.

Anyway, in one of my conversations with my younger students, the topic of my aversion or discomfort about the hug issue came up.  They all gave me their opinions, basically saying that I should be happy that my students hug me because that means they like me.

 Student 1:  why do you have that look on your face when they hug you?  you don't like being hugged?

 Me :  (absorbed at what I was reading)  But I don't need a hug!  


  explosive laughter.

  not just from my students, but from the class next door.

  and so I have become, the little ol' grump.

 
 p.s.

   i would like to make it clear that I do hug my friends and I do like hugging my tutees Richard and Olivia, and yes I do like hugging Z.
   that's all, thanks.
   

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

whew 2

jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnn!!!!

my final grade in my first online grad class is an A+!

yey!

i wanna call my mom now.

tee-hee.

free candy for my students on Halloween.

more dancing at home tonight as i clean the apartment.

yey!!!

Monday, October 27, 2008

whew

and just like that, my first course in grad school is over.

sigh. talk about baptism of fire. but knowing me, i'm grinnin' ear to ear after all the chaos and the cramming.

not really.

i just realized, at this age that i do not like group work. scrap that, i think i disliked group work way back in college. i was just reminded by how much i disliked it when i had to do a group project for my class.

see, back in high school, bossy ol' me loved group work because i was always the leader. i thrived in group work. big group work, and mostly of co-curricular nature. i loved theater production. loved loved loved it. still do.

come college, i mostly chilled and concentrated on my studies. i started looking after my own back. for one, i disliked user-friendly classmates in college who refuse to take their own notes and ask me if they can just photocopy mine. solution? i used neon pens. they don't come out when you photocopy them in the cheap ass photocopiers we had in jumanities.

anyway, back to grad school, so we had to make a slide show. i was an eager beaver to get an A on this class so i said to meself that i will do well with this group project. turns out my group mates were a bunch of eager beavers as well. two can't seem to get enough of extra work. i backed off because i didn't want to add on to the club, so i said, okay i'll do what's left.

anyway, long story short. we crammed for this project and almost didn't meet the deadline. i was hit by my two groupies because they felt that i didn't give in as much time for the project.

okay, i respect that.

but wait, here's my take on it:

say for example, that in a group of 4 we all had our piece of the puzzle to do. my working style has been. okay, delegate, work individually, and reconvene at a given time.

groupie 1 gave me two other tasks aside from my part : to write the intro and conclusion of the slide show. did ideliver? yes, i did, and in a timely manner.

i do not see any benefits of staying up late, losing sleep and staying online all night just to wait for one another to finish. come on, we all have other things to do. besides, the number of hours spent does not necessarily amount to the same amount or level of productivity. sleep deprivation is bad for the brain cells. this we all just read in this month's class. and then there's the phone. you know...

if there's something strange ... in your neighborhood... who you gonna call?

with a fulltime job, tutoring 3 kids on the side, an apartment to maintain and this grad class to think of, the weekends are the only days i can run my errands. i tutor on the weekends as well. my groupies all stayed by the computer all weekend. i stayed online for a certain number of hours. i slept at 2 am on friday night, and 12 am, saturday.

when i had to go to bestbuy to return an electronic on its final day for return, on saturday, i asked my groupies a couple of hours before i had to go that i'll have to run errands, and that to PLEASE give me a call if they need me so i can rush back home or find internet connection somewhere so i can do what i need to do for the group.

groupie 1 said, they'll be fine. so said "cool."

a few hours later, when i logged on, i got an offline message from groupie 1 that groupie 2 had to revise my reference page because i didn't follow the prescribed APA format. ooops, my bad, but she did not have to do that, that's my job. so i asked 1 if he tried calling me, because i was obssessing at my phone looking at it every 30 minutes to make sure i have a signa,l should any of them need me. 1 said he tried calling me, i didn't answer. i told him i had no missed call. i checked the number with him. he got my area code wrong. he was calling maryland for procopio's sake.

and yes, i felt bad for that.

but in the end what can i do? just hope that things get better next time and get things straight about working habits from the get go.

the good thing about them though is this : they really are great people. and i'm glad we're still friends.

now if only i can still get an A in this class.

Monday, October 20, 2008

another early monday

and so i survived week 3 of my first month in grad school. i have 2 more porjects due this week and one group project.  

yesterday i had my first group webconference where i saw a groupmate from japan, philly and dallas.   sweet.

last week too, slim and celebrated our first anniversary.  wow, we were both stumped when we realized that it has been a year since we first met.  tomorrow is the anniversary of our first date.

slim's been a great help for me last week.  i was down with fever, and he played my nurse.  he also optimized my boo so he's up and running like new.  he's got a new toy, the Asus Eee.  He might exchange it for a better model.

Anyway, it's monday again.  Here's to another week of learning, teaching, cramming, wrting bs, torturing my adorable kids and doing it all over again.



Sunday, October 12, 2008

busy as a bee

  i know i'm gonna be crazy busy.  there had been moments this week when i wanted to to run to 7/11 and buy a pack of ciggys, but  i didn't and just chew gum.  for the most part, my jaws hurt and i've gotten gas.  oh well.  

 stress my eye.


  in other news, i had a de javu experience as i frantically tried to beat the deadline for my project in grad school this week.  the deadline was 11:45pm, and as i clicked "send" at 8:30 pm, i yelled my relief and did the dance of joy.

  i'll do better this week.  matter of fact, i'll get started on my reading after this post.

   i had my first classroom observation last week. dunno what my vice principal thought because i have not gotten his feedback yet.

   it's a sweet and happy feeling to be fed a home cooked dinner and breakfast, no matter how simple the dish may be.

   Z is now fond of pork adobo, pineapple chicken and milo chocolate milk.

  i love jolt cola.

 
    

Thursday, October 9, 2008

two timing

i'm alive alert awake enthusiastic!!!
ching!!!!!

so, i am awake now and invigorated thanks to my cinnamon-laced cup of joe fro m 7/11.  incidentally, diane and i spotted a cutie clerk there with a hint of will smith aura going on.  pero pinoy 'to.  very cute.

anyway, so i now i am rearing to actively participate in my class discussion this week and kick some overachievers' asses! 

my three day absence due to lakwatsa and work has seriously hurt my time-space warp powers and so i was up to my neck w/ readings.

anyway, i am rambling as usual.

you should see me now.

i am huddled in my temporary bedroom office space, using MAX while BOO, my good old dell Inspiron 600m is by MAX's side.  

and how many hands do i have?  

two computers at once? 

did i tell you i am a gemini?  

anyway, my point is...

I MISS MY RIGHT CLICK.

fart.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

random rants and gripes with a side of friendship

background music ;  yeah by usher (it's what's playing on my pandora station, ya feel me?)

diane's visit was a hoot.  NYC with her was twice as good and exciting all over again.  and added bonus was a face to face with Z on our second day out.  heart stopping barbecue and RUB, a walk in central park, coffee at columbus circle and seeing clinton kelly at borders?  what more can a girl ask for?

maybe that diane come and ive here for a couple of years?  


i'm a bit dizzy from the computer screen's glare.
dizzy too, from too much reading.
i have a paper to write
and a project 
due
saturday and sunday respectively.
grad school's a  big fat pain, but oh well, this is what i wanted.


i finally joined facebook.
i am hooked, to say the least.

but yey, tomorrow's yom kippur so i don't have to go to work.
and Z's coming to visit.

sweet.

i need someone to make sure i do my schoolwork.

like now, i should be studying.
but no,

i'm blogging.

bleh.



Sunday, October 5, 2008

bananas in pajamas at ba pa

diane and i called each other B1 and B2 after those pajama-ed bananas on TV (why oh why we started dressing up fruits and veggies, i do not know).  college sisses, we shared a passion for literature, great friends and putah-red lipstick.

diane is on va-cay with me for the next few days.  off we go to AC today to paint the town our very own potah red.

incidentally, i went to watch football last friday.  our school marching band is bangin' y'all!
 
due to some unexplained and frustrating goings on with my wireless network, Z set up MAC nd Boo side by side so I can be connected to the net.  I have a sweet corner office by my bedroom and now i d not even want to leave my bedroom.  this may be good so at least i can leave t dining area and living room less cluttered.

oh we can always dream...


Tuesday, September 30, 2008

MARIANG KALABASA

  screee!!!!   i am gonna watch the smashing pumpkins in november!!!!   yey!  yey!  yey!  this is first concert of the year.  i'll be going with Z's housemate who's a rocker type dude so i won't lok  like a sorry sap all by my lonesome there.

  rock-rockan na 'to!!!!

Monday, September 29, 2008

gnarly

something rells me this whole online class is.

my university is not playing.

snap.

part of the overachiever in me (yes, that's jane) wants to undo all the mistakes in my past attempts at grad school. i want to do well. very well. i told bipolar burr and i psyched about going back to school.

and s, at 4 am, i opened up Max (that's my new powerbook's name) and we set down to work. i viewed 17 mini video clips this morning, i took an intro assessment.

easy peasy so far.

when my third period class left, i logged on to check if my professor has posted assignments.

yep. she did.

first week's assignment : 80 pages worth of reading.

gah.

noo-ni-noo-ni-noo.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

sunday in the big (wet) apple

i met up with former student dave.  he's on his vacation, and bless his heart, he found time to meet up with his old high school teacher.  that would be me.

dave is one of my beloved first batch of students, way back in 1997.  who would've thought 11 years later he and i would catch up in times square nyc?  ain't it grand?

dave is now  a nurse, a grad of hunter college.  did i mention he's very good looking, sweet and such a gentleman?  

he and went down to soho from times square.  we visited uniqlo. i got me some tights and some nice thermal tops.  uniqlo is the best place to get good quality clothing at a reasonable price.  their men's wear is very much to my liking.  i better bring Z  here or his buddy BD.  i'm sure they would like this place.  dave,  a sharp dresser,  made a couple of purchases in the store as well.  he has good taste, i must say.  

after hanging out in a neighborhood park, we headed back to my hood to eat some good old artery clogging filipino food.  

after taking a few pictures, we said goodbye and hope we will meet again.

oli, david, rinelle, brian... kelan tayo magkikita-kita?  anyone else game?

Friday, September 26, 2008

birthday

and just like that. another year has passed. it's your birthday once again, dad.
i know you peek in my blog every now and then. may this year bring you peace, love and happiness. i miss you and i love you.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

tight


my schedule is awesome. i get the two difficult classes in the first two hours of school, and it's just a sweet ride from there. true, i know it's really stressful no matter what, but at least i can face the rest of the day looking forward to my three other classes.

my sophomores, who are a funny bunch, but can really test the patience of saints, have a tendency to rip each other apart. unfortunately, a thin wall separates my room from the other room. the next class can hear me and my kids LOUD and CLEAR.

incidentally, some of the kids next door are my freshmen students.

great.

this morning, B asked me if i was tired. i thought she asked me if i was tight. tight means, if i've had it up to my neck and i'm millimeters away from being furious.

me: oh i thought you asked if i was tight.
B : (laughing) miss, you know what "tight" means.
me : yeah i know, it means i'm angry.
B : what you be knowing these words by black people for?
me : i might was well, i hang out with all of you all day anyway, might as well know your language.
B : you funny, miss.
me : you have no idea.


and so halfway into class, after repeatedly imploring my kids to stay on task. i put my arms on my waist and yelled


"I'M TIGHT NOW!"


silence.


"and you all better believe it"

i gave them homework and they laughed at my face. they said i'm funny.

goodness me, i didn't know i'd be a comic teaching them kidz.

hmph.









Tuesday, September 23, 2008

the fat ass awakes

i just logged back in my online fitness journal. weeks of guiltless eating of pansit, turon, rice and ulam... are now biting me back on my fat ass.

it's time to get serious with getting back in shape.

i'm actually going to the gym after this post.

apparently, the cuckoo club at my local curves all went AWOL about the same time i stopped going in the summer. and now we're back in full force.

incidentally, my feeling over achiever self was dismayed when the computer records show that i've only had 69 registered workout sessions. gah! and the other chicks in the gym bravely sport 200- 300-500- and even an 800 workout shirts.

well, hooray for workout # 70 for today. i know there's a glitch because we have to scan our handy dandy bar code id tags and i normally don't because it's too early, yadayadayada.

anyway...

tomorrow is back to school night.

but before that is today.

and slim say's he's gonna visit.

tee-hee.

happy happy joy joy.

okay, time to go to the gym.


Saturday, September 20, 2008

a student made me cry

blasted journal writing prompt. it's a good thing i wore my water proof mascara today.

i try to improve my kids' writing skills by making them write short periods of time everyday. and at least twice a week, i ask them to respond to a journal writing prompt.

yesterday, i asked them to write at least 10 sentences on the topic "I love hanging out with _______ "

while sophomores made it seem like they were having all their teeth pulled. my freshmen were more receptive.

i have a slim and shorty in my class. instead of a couple, these two are tight best friends, more like brothers. slim and shorty both have a bit of a speech defect, but for some reason, they understand each other perfectly. they both serve as translators for each other.

and yes, i have both of them in the same class.

anyway, so shorty has been writing intently on his journal, and took a few minutes longer to finish his work. when he finished, he handed me his journal and told me to read it. so i did. "read it out loud," he said. i was surprised. normally they don't want to share journal entries.

i cleared my throat and read...

"...me and my girl made a promise to each other that we will be there for each other no matter what. we both hope and pray that some day we will marry and have our own family, but for now we just want to be together. i love hanging out with my girl because she makes me feel so happy and important."

the two female girls in that class were also moved by his entry. i looked at him and said. "shorty, why you do dat? you be making me cry now, that ain't funny." we all burst out laughing.

but i did cry. you see, (i know this will sound corny) most of the kids i have in my classes come from tough homes, mostly single parent families and most of the time, they are seen as trouble makers or "retards" in their other classes. my kids may take more time to learn what the other kids are studying, but they can learn. and they can be as soft and mushy as any "well behaved" regular ed young lady or gentleman.

sure i can tell shorty that this is all puppy love and you know "better not get your girl pregnant lest you wanna be someone's baby daddy" but i am not jaded like that. i just patted him on the shoulder and said "that was an awesome journal entry, shorty, i am happy that you and your girl have dreams together."

with that he gave me a sheepish grin. he was hugged by his girl classmates and slim and another guy classmate shook on it.

this is my family, and i sure am thankful to have these kids with me.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

now I know my ABC...

it's day 3 of season 11 titser, titser : the adventures and ms. adventures of ms. baril.

s
o far, i love my classes. love the schedule. love my students. i have three classes straight from 1st to 3rd period, prep and lunch break from 10:40- 1:00 pm and then two classes from 1:00-2:50. number of students so far : 8,4,6,4 and 3. wow, pwede ba itong itaya sa lotto?

i feel excited to plan activities for my classes and hopefully we can all have meaningful experiences in class.

the name change is still a bit strange for most of my students. a couple of them complained that now that they know how to pronounce my former name, i changed it to my maiden name. most of them couldn't get my name right -- they call me ms. ba-rul. or ms. ba-reel accent of the first syllable.

oh well, some of them settled for ms. b.

as for my former students, they been trickling down my room one by one, asking how i've been and how they miss making me angry. gush. i can really feel the love.

it's almost 6 am and i'm already dressed and made-up.

it this doesn't tell you i'm excited, i dunno what will.

my show starts at 8:10. i've got time to kill...

Sunday, September 7, 2008

prayer in the square


there is nothing more fitting than to spend my 8th year anniversary of coming to america in an afternoon of prayer for thanksgiving, peace, hope and renewal with about 20,000 brothers and sisters in Christ, right smack in the middle of times square.

and so for our final summer date Z and i met at port authority and went our way to times square with a side trip to toys r us to say hi to bumblebee and optimus prime.

this is my first prayer rally and i did not really know what to expect. it was just an hour, but it felt so energizing and uplifting to be in that place at that time. there were several people who lead the prayers, two pastors from times square church, a couple others from other churches, an NYPD officer, a member of the US navy, a member of the youth choir, and spokesperson for a latino church. of course in between the prayer leaders, there was inspiring and groovy music led by the times square church choir.

from where we were standing, we were surrounded a numerous filipinos. there was a great feeling of camaraderie and unity. now i know how it feels when my friend pj said that there is power in number, especially in prayer.

we prayed for the next president, for this country, our homeland, our families and friends.

i'm saving the date for next year, and i hope i can take part in prayer in the square once again.

my place in this world

background music: the mesopotamians by they might be giants

while discussing a chapter on gilgamesh, and the underworld as part of her lessons in mesopotamia...

olivia: so enkidu went to hell?
me : no, he went to the underworld...

and on and on we went about the different beliefs on the afterlife of different cultures...

olivia : sighs. i'm creeped out.
me : why cutie, it's just a story.
olivia : because that means maybe we can't see each other in heaven when we die. (frowns and looks like she is going to cry)
me : maybe not, but we have now and we can see each other now. besides, we still have a little time. you have more living to do.
olivia : okay.


this was how a part of our conversation went last friday. i am amazed at how far i have gone with my two tutees. olivia barely talked when i started tutoring them, and now she is disturbed about the afterlife, wants to do her nails with me, and asked me if i will take her shopping when i sleep over next week for our weekly story time/reading sessions. my little girl is now a pre-tween.

one of the things that hit me hard going through tough times last year is the realization that i am so blessed to be in a profession that i love. what a blessing indeed to wake up everyday excited to share and learn with my students, spend afternoons tutoring a few younger kids and getting to know their hopes and fears and getting to know their brilliant minds and hearts. true, at my age i could have a child of my own, but when i think about it, i have, even in the slightest way, been mother to some of these kids.

and so, after so many years of searching, one day last year, i yelled out loud to our Boss up there and said "I get it Lord! I know where I'm supposed to be. I don't know why you think I'm fit to do this, but I thank you for such an honor and blessing to spend time with these young people."

and though sometimes i question my ability and aptness to provide academic instruction to my special needs teenagers, though sometimes i want to shave my head with the stress of butting heads with their know-it-all-i don't-care-watchu-think" selves, the next day i look forward to doing the same things over and over again.

another school year officially begins tomorrow. this is my 11th back to school year. i'm probably more excited than my students, and for 11 years, i am thankful that i am as nervous and excited as the first day of school in 1997, back in los banos, prepping myself to welcome my sophomore students to the wonderful world of asian and african literature. from rural to south hill to pre school to middle school and now to high school again, i've come full circle as i face a new batch of sophomores and freshmen to our home for the next 9 months.

lights
camera
action

now i can only figure out what to wear...





Monday, September 1, 2008

a suit story

background music : teenage love affair by alicia keys

i did it. i bought my first ever adult power suit. i said something about looking the part of a serious educator right? well at least le's get the "look" like a serious educator right. i think there's something psychological with wearing clothes that look good on you and clothes that exude a certain aura or purpose. costume/props it may seem, but i found that clothes have that effect on me.

while Z was snoozing, i took my final summer walk at the outlet malls and proceeded to the usual shops that i go to. i already know that for me to get the perfect suit, i have to go to my favorite tailor to alter the suit to my specs. even the short length pants or trousers from banana republic and j crew still have to hemmed for my height, or lack thereof.

i have always loved the chinos at j crew. the clothes, most if them i like, but i do not like them enough to shell out that much money. this is why H and M is my favorite clothing store because they have relatively inexpensive but stylish and trendy clothes. my friend lubsi also loves j. crew and this is what she calls, the place where she let's out her "preppy white self."

lucky for me, there's a j. crew outlet here down da shore.

nomally, a decent and quality all natural cloth material suit costs about $150-$200 average. and that's just the jacket. a pair of suit pants costs anywhere between $50-$120. i got both for $170. with alterations, im looking at an additional $30, but that leaves me with a $200 investment on a suit. alteration is expensive, but a must for a good fit. would've had my suit altered anyway, no matter where i bought it.

but wait, there's more to this story. i seem to really it it off with gay guys. travis, the sales assistant who hooked me up with j.crew's 15% teacher's discount was just fabulous. he noticed the trapeze top that i wore which i cinched with a belt, i told him they were both from old navy at $5 each and he was floored. i knew right there and then that he will take care of me.

and took care of me he did. i really didn't bring my NJEA card, but because i looked cute in the suit that we picked and because he said i had style, he spoke to his manager and i ended up with a 30% off on the suit for labor day sale and an additional 15%. and since i was in jersey, there is no sales tax.

i will post a picture when i have my first classroom observation. i felt a little strange looking at the chick in the suit looking back at me from the mirror. so grown up and quite sophisticated. but #1 fan approves. he says i should meet his folks in this suit.

yeah, right.

meanwhile, methinks i better practice walking around in heels with this suit.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

the calm before the storm


i'm still spinning like a top on caffeine to the google power.

i know i've said a couple of times that i don't like having long periods of "vacation." i don't like it because i get lazier by the day.

but lookie now. i'm stressed out because i feel like i'm about to hit a whole mess of stress and work.

thank goodness for karen. she is my organic happy pill. she keeps me grounded and she slaps me if need it.

so noo-ni-noo-ni-noo.


two happy bits of news.

my friends S and L gave birth to little tyler.

sweet.

and then,

i got the "torturing" job that i've been praying for. yey!!!! richard and olivia are a bit sad to know that this new job means they won't be seeing me,not that they need me. i am but one soldier in an army of tutors hired to assure them of academic success in the stressful and ever competitive world of private schools.

i am very happy at this prospect because this will definitely help me in saving money. thank God for this blessing talaga.

i am very excited and kinda anxious about starting grad school. i hopefully i will hear from my admissions rep. i am mailing my scholarship application tomorrow, finally. i hope i make it i hope i make it. please. please please.

in other news cleo and i have been prepping for the start of the school year -- clothes-wise. she got me to consider wearing skirts.

but wait

pencil skirts.

we'll see how my logs look in them.

i know my number one fan approves of the stern teacher/secretary look. having a new principal this school year made me realize i have to rethink my work outfits. have to look the part. stacy and clinton will be so proud of me.
a shout out to candy : dude, i found uniqlo this tuesday. i love it. great basics. you're right of course. saw some lovely astro boy tees and naturally i thought of you.

a drink with gay bf #3, weekend torturing and cleaning up de crib, and a weekend with Z just before school starts.



Tuesday, August 26, 2008

iscurred

gah.

i finished my FAFSA application for grad school on sunday morning. i submitted my application online on the same day. now the admissions reps have been calling me. i still need to mail my scholarship application today.

i need ultra mega vitamins, because at night, all i do is read and sleep.

maybe i need gummiberry juice.

toink.

toink.

toink.


bleh. i'm going to the city with cleo today. original plan was to go to astoria. now i think we will go from 42nd st. at times sqaure all the way downtown.

broadway huuurrrrr we come.

yes mom, i put on sunblock.

sorry Z, i know you like my "tan" but if i did not put sunblock on, i'll be darker than my shadow.

babushka

Saturday, August 23, 2008

three day round up

1. dallied into bestbuy to finally get a replacement battery for click. salivated over an Asus Eee pc. mura lang, $449 lang. but no, i think i'll have to wait for my Mac book that comes with my new course in grad school.
2. cleo invited me over for dinner. yummy green bean in tomato sauce dish. salad and lots of coversation. walked off the calories after that.
3. watched The Cho Show with Chocnut. he, in TX and I, on my couch with the phonr cradled on my right shoulder. twas my first experiece in tv watching on the phone. we agreed to make it a date next week.
4. FRIDAY - hopped on bruce at 10 am to go visit Aneta, an hour away from home.
5. had the longest car ride and traffic. 2 major accidents. i hate route 80. what would've taken me 1 hour took me 3 1/2 hours!!!!
6. had yummy polish food and great conversation with aneta about oh, almost everything. tee-hee.
7. have i told you i have the best friends ever?!
8. got back on the road home.
9. decided to navigate route 46.
10. that was loooooooong.
11. somehow found myself on route 3 then garden state parkway, and finally route 4.
12. home sweet home.
13. torturing started today at 7:30 am
14. went to target
15. went to trader joe's to get some healthy frozen food.
16. had a small cup of yolato's mango and dulce de leche ice cream. forget about mitsuwa's green tea ice cream for now.
17. wrote a letter to my grandparents.
18. finally sitting down to make a list of things to do.
19. busy day tomorrow.



Thursday, August 21, 2008

two week countdown

i'm back from a week's hiatus of some sorts. i don't usually like vacations because i tend to be idle instead of doing productive things. i need some sort of work to keep me going.

thank goodness J called me and scheduled a back to school daily torturing sessions with my two favorite korean-american kids. what a sweet reunion.

my richard is already 12. he's already two inches taller than me, and as sweet and as thoughtful as ever. we are discussing the good earth by pearl buck, his summer reading novel. olivia, 11 is getting lovelier everyday. she and i both finished reading rick riordan's sea of monsters. another convert, mwehehe.

as a bonus we are watching the odyssey. i'm still thinking if i should buy the good earth dvd.

tomorrow, i will visit aneta and her boys.

a totally unrelated topic, i am obsessed with french manicure and pedicure. what makes it sweeter for me is i know i'm saving at least $35 for doing my own nails. and look mom, i can color my nails and toenails within the lines. why didn't i have these coloring/painting skills when i was in elementary schools? tee-hee

chocnut said his current obsession is the pedi egg. he says his feet are as soft and smooth as a babe's booty. i wanna. i wanna.

my manicure and pedicure obsession is brought to you by youtube .

bow.

summer's almost over.

sigh.


Sunday, August 17, 2008

tagged : nicknames

since i am taking a break from my summer reading, patulan na nga ang tag ni timmi.

List ALL the names you were called by and the people/person who called you that. Tag at least 5 members of your contacts and give a comment on their site for them to know they've been tagged.


Joffin-Mari = my real name. my mom's name is maria josefina. o di ba, mini me talaga.

Joffin-Mari Therese = my baptismal name. di bagay ang therese sa akin, swear.

Joffin = this is what most people call me. mostly my family and classmates.

Pipin = i have a cousin who used to call me by this name because he can't pronounce F properly.

Tupin = my cousin Chino used to call me Ate Tupin, i dunno what's up with that, i guess J and F are both difficult to say for toddlers. my other younger cousins call me by this name also

Jupi = Fanny calls me this. sometimes, er herbovore bro calls me by this name, among other things.

Jop = My very close friends call me this.

Jop-Jop = this was what my HS barkada used to call me in our early highschool days.

Mamajop = college brods and sisses call me this, i think because of our band Mamajammas.

Ms. Baril = UPRHS my screen name in my teaching years in UPRHS and South hell.

Ms. Durga Baril = my second batch of students from Rural High sometimes called me this. I was in my Hindu mythology phase back then.

Ms. A = is what my high school kids call me.

Jane = is what strangers call me. When Z wants something, he calls me by this name also. This was my screen name in the site where we met.

Jane Gunne = abangan sa suking tindahan.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

summer holiday

background music : hey mama by BEP

i finally made it down in south jersey after slumming it out this weekend and keeping in touch with slim on the phone during the weekend. it's abnormally cold and windy down here i've had enough of my hair slapping my face. don't even get me started on the long and painful process of brushing out the tangle mess.

ayan kasi,pahaba-haba ka pa kasi ng buhok.

today officially starts my week long summer holiday with Z.

time to get on the bike.

a lazy picnic at th park

home cooked dinners.

run/brisk walking in different neighborhoods.

visiting the city for more sights and tastes.

i'm thinking of crossing the brooklyn bridge and getting a slice of grimaldi's pizza and a scoop of ice cream.

double decker bus.

economy candy.

midtown comics

gray's papaya.

swweeeet.

better charge click's battery.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

independence day

background music : last goodbye by jeff buckley

i got divorced today.

i am single now.

i even got to reclaim by birth name.


name change

of course i was very tempted to change it to wonderwoman, or maybe jane gunne, but i kept the name my parents gave me. for a while i even wanted my name to be durga. but today of all days i just happy to be back to ol' me : JM(T)PB.




men in black

and i'm not talking about will smith and tommy lee jones.

a long time ago, a mayor, wearing a black toga officiated my marriage in a civil ceremony. he was the mayor of the borough X lived in at that time. today at around 12 noon, another honorable man, wearing a similar black gown, officially and legally severed the ties that bound me to a man who was my husband of 6 1/2 years.


congratulations


i told some of my friends, who i consider my family, of the change of status. most of them were happy and said congratulations. i was happy to be on the phone so i didn't have to show a reaction or a facial expression. some of my friends were quick to add "you know what we mean" to their congratulations. my mom and aunts were also happy at my news. my mom said congratulations like i won the lottery. i suppose i can understand my mother. which mother would not be affected by a child's heartache anyway? especially since she was not able to comfort me in person. i have not seen her in two years so i know, for her, an ending to this ordeal was a happy one.

peelings

how is one suppsed to feel about ending a marriage anyway? i guess there is joy and relief for those who are victims of abuse and violence. as for me, as much as i am relieved that i have closed this chapter in my life, i could not help but feel a little bit sad at the end of things.
it's a kind of sad you feel after the end of a movie or after a sad story. that's it. it's done. it's over. goodbye.

i have thought and agonized about this day. how would i feel? will i be angry and say something nasty? will i just bawl my eyes out unexpectedly at the slightest provocation? i almost drove myself sleepless at such thoughts until jane snapped me out of it and knocked some sense in my head.

i would feel what i feel when i need to feel it.

i can not expect anything.

i don't expect anything anymore.

besides, i don't think anybody would wish for such sadness deliberately. i know for sure, as a little girl, i did not wish nor say "when i grow up, i want to be divorced!" kinda like not one little girl says " when i grow up, i want to be a prostitute." it just doesn't go that way. of course i hoped for a happily ever after.

but that was not for me, not with X anyway.

the most important thing that i got from this closure is this : that despite the sad and painful way things turned out to be, i came out a bit bruised, but still standing. that despite having lost a loved one, so much love was showered upon me by God so that i have more love to give and share with my family, friends, students and who knows, that one person who i can have a happily ever after with.

bear with this mushy post dear reader. jane has got a heart too, you know.














Monday, August 4, 2008

on a sunday afternoon

background music : on a sunday afternoon by a lighter shade of brown

yesterday was a picture perfect day in the city. i took full advantage of the beautiful weather and spent most of it in the city with Z.

we met up in port authority and made our made to times square church in time for the 3pm service. i always have a great time attending sunday service at TSC. the music is awesome and pastor neil rhodes is very engaging and humorous.

after church we made our way to greenpoint in brooklyn to have early dinner at
Krolewskie Jadlo or "king's feast"i don't really care much for tomato soup because i feel like i'm drinking spaghetti sauce, but this polish take on the tomato soup was very yummy -- it had rice in it, but not quite like tomato flavored lugaw. for entrees, Z had a polish platter which had pierogi, kielbasa and golabki. i had goulash in potato pancake. i think my entree was good enough for two people. it was very good. we washed our hearty dinner with a tall big icy mug of good ol’ polish beer, zywiec. here’s the funny thing about me and Z. We are both soft on drinking. Halfway through our mug, we were both buzzed. We both like beer or at least we like to try new beers once in a while, but we usually have a bottle to wash down food.

Buzzed and busog (full), we went to get dessert at riviera café a few blocks north of king’s feast. I had a slice of their black forest cake and Z had raspberry and dark chocolate cake. I would’ve taken pictures of our food but shyness got the better of me. I became self-conscious that I was the only non-polish person in the pastry shop and the restaurant and I didn't’t want them to think that I am too touristy. we walked off some of the calories by taking a stroll in a nearby park and stayed there ‘til sunset. Then we took the train back to manhattan and back to our separate homes.

With camp ending this week, I look forward to more day trips in the city. I better get a new battery replacement for click so the kodak moments do not go to waste.I’m glad I took click with me yesterday. The last pics we took were from march. I am so excited to put a couple of pics in my already numerous picture frames scattered all over my apartment.

Friday, August 1, 2008

TGIF

today concludes week 5 of summer camp. one more week and i say goodbye to these cute and lovable 10-12 year olds. sniff. gosh. pretty soon it's gonna be back to school again.

gah.

this afternoon we had the yearly camp talent show. i was asked to dress up to be a "judge." since i taught a comic book writing class, a suggestion came up that maybe i should try coming in as a comic book/ superhero.

great.

see, even though i'm a drama teacher, i don't like role playing. scratch that. i actually do., but not that kind of role playing. strike that one last statement too. tee-hee.

anyway, since i was not so excited to play dress up. i just pulled an all black ensemble and put a red and black sun and moon cape on and came in as...

typhoon

storm's cousin.

ha.


anyway, the kids had a great time with us. after camp we went to hang out in S's house to celebrate his birthday with him.

3 glasses of white wine later, i made my way back home and had a nice long chat with slim. we both can't wait for sunday for a date in the city.

as for tomorrow, i head out bright and early to take a walk with cleo.
and this time, we're talking a walk outdoors.

sleep calls.

have a great weekend, dear reader.


Thursday, July 31, 2008

of denim jeans and what else? -- shoes

i haven't been blogging as often as i normally do. mostly because i've been glued to the tv watching TLC's jon and kate plus eight, what not to wear ; travel channel's china series and NYC channel's cool in your code, ladidadida.

i managed to break my slacking off in the exercise area. though i cut belly dancing class because i had started a monster load of laundry. but i have more than a month before school starts to whip me up in better shape. i went to a local park in my neighboring town. one round of the park is exactly 1.2 miles. i timed myself. i did one round in 20 minutes and on tuesday, i walked 3.6 miles. yey!
i like the landscape of the park, and instead of annoying me, the health freaks in that park actually motivated me to jog every 5 minutes or so.
i got together with cleo last night, we did some indoor walkathon -- in the mall. tsk tsk tsk.
nuff said.
let's just say that the shoe whore is happy once again.

okay okay, i have to spill a bit.

think patent.
peep toes.
3 inches.
sexay....



;and that's not all virginia...but i'll stop on that trip to the mall for now.

in other news, in the spirit of saving money, i thought of venturing into doing my own toe nails. and my beauty school teacher from the community school fanny and i went to, oh many many years ago must be so proud of me because i can now do a decent french pedi on my own toe-sies. a good skill to learn, french pedi, for a shoe-whore like moi.


doing two weeks worth of laundry made me face the reality that aside from being a shoe addict, i am also a denim jean addict as well. i am currently obsessed with skinny jeans.
never mind that my logs look like sossages. i like 'em.

forever 21 sells some inexpensive skinny jeans for $12.50. they have this nice black and dark blue wash.

but my fave so far is levi's 531 skinny jeans


unfortunately, i again did not listen to my friends' advice to get a pair of jeans that are snug when i try them on for the first time. my friend told me to get a size that lets out the muffin top because most jeans have Lycra or spandex in them anyway and will "expand" sooner or later. long story short, my lovely 531s are a bit big now. so i'm thinking of getting another pair for fall. and how many jeans to i have now, in total?
hmmm, 4 pairs of skinny (2 black, 2 dark blue)
1 pair flared
2 pairs of boot cut, mid rise
1 pair trouser jeans

not bad huh?
sadly, a stricter dress code has been imposed on us teachers starting september so it's bye bye jeans. sigh.

oh gee, lookit the time, it's eleven already and i've camp tomorrow. argh. my bed is littered with clothes again. thank goodness i have a big bed and can do the slide it to the side manuever and turn my back and ignore the mess move.

TGIF.
one more week of camp.
a sunday date.
noo-ni-noo-ni-noo.



p.s.

HOW CAN I FORGET?! THAT PINK PAIR OF NINE WEST SHOES THAT I SET MY EYES ON AS EARLY AS JANUARY?! I GOT IT FOR 65% OFFF. SWEEEEEETTTT!!!!!

Friday, July 25, 2008

just for kicks...

i borrowed some cds from the library
on
how
to
speak
czech.

as if spanish is not difficult enough to learn.
czech is very stingy with vowels.

so far i can say (i wrote the czech phrases phonetically, so don't complain, okay? i'm no spelling bee champien)


dobri den = hello/good day

prominte = excuse me

dyekuyi = thank you

nerozumim cheski = i don't understand czech

ne vim = i don't know.

ye sem filipinka = i am filipina


tee- hee. of course i know a couple of other czech words that slim tells me i am not allowed to say in front of other people.

for now...

on with the czech lessons

noo-ni-noo-ni-noo




guess who's turning five?


it's my favorite car in the whole wide world.....

yup, tomorrow, my automated bestfriend turns five years old.

i will treat him to a nice car wash tomorrow.

and to celebrate, maybe he and i can go to mitsuwa for some green tea ice crean and he can also hang out with his japanese buddies at the supermarket's parking lot.

cheers to my speedy, dependable and super guapo car.

haluvsyah.



Thursday, July 24, 2008

the dark knight, monster ice cream and our first hibachi

i got back from a weekend down the shore with slim. a bit sleepy from the drive, but all worth it. the weekend was hot and humid -- very bad hair day so kulot ang buhok ko.

unfortunately, the imax theater has sold out its tix for the dark knight the whole weekend. so Z and i made do with the regular cinema across town.

WHY SO SERIOUS?! i love the joker. he was really crazy-scary. though the movie was a bit long, ledger and oldman's characters made it so worth the length. (i only took a pee break once because i did not want to miss a thing). and oh bo by george, Z did not sleep most of the movie. i was impressed. he probably missed about 5- minutes of the movie, but i can't blame him. i thought the movie was a bit long.

after the movie we went to visit a cold stone creamery shop and had ourselves some icy goodness. the ice cream concoction that i chose was pretty neat, it was called cheesecake fantasy. but i still rank mitsuwa's soft serve green tea ice cream my fave of all time.


we did a round of electronic window shopping at best buy and circuit city. as much as i like to buy clothes, i am also interested in the latest gadgets and gizmos around. of course this penchant for electronics is genetically encoded in the male DNA so Z was pretty much in his playground.

we also went to our first hibachi experience. and i wanna do it again. our chef was very showbiz. the food was delish and although i was not so sold on the idea of dining with strangers, it turned out to be pretty fun in the end.


i still have 2 1/2 weeks of camp, then a couple of weeks of vacation.

noo-ni-noo-ni-noo

Thursday, July 17, 2008

and then...



the next thing i know, it's 6:42. and i feel like something huge just rammed against my lower body.

in pain.

gah.

no jogging for me today.

but i am comforted by the fact that i am sore.

this means the trek up da hills is working.

now..

to the batcave!

err, camp, i mean

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

jane's ass kicking update

background music : play your part by girl talk

i went out with cleo and we trekked up and down my camp area for an hour. man, whatta workout.

i just finished ironing on t-shirt designs for my comic book writing class. we're such dorks.

tomorrow is lesson two of belly dancing.

let's see what time i wake up tomorrow and find out if i can get up and jog for at least halk an hour...

iggy, may the force be with you.

p.s.

OMG, how can i forget?! i think i might've found the perfect graduate program for moi... excited!!!!


jane should kick my ass already

because the past week i've been caught in a rut. i have not been to curves at all, and i only started walking again yesterday.
and i've been waking up late -- 5:30-6:00 in the mornings.


and i've been drinking too much coconut and vanilla flavored iced coffee (no sugar, just milk) from dunkin donuts
and i've been eating their turkey, bacon and cheddar flatbread sandwich for breakfast for the past two work weeks.


and i've been watching too much jon and kate plus 8 on TLC.

and i just got engrossed in a new chick lit book. meg cabot is hilarious.



and i've been eating mangoes 3x a day.

and i love girltalk's new album.

but don't worry, jane packed us a bag of our workout clothes plus MP3 player so i can run and walk up and down

the hills here in camp later in the afternoon.

the hill here in camp is a great workout. not to mention the many steps in camp. stairmaster my eye.

now if only i can get over my fear of meeting lost wild animals in the area.. i should be good.


and if i can get my ass up early in morning to jog in the boardwalk this weekend, i should be good.

and if i can get to drink my soy milk 2x a day and drink carrot juice and my green icky juice instead of anything from dunkin donuts i'll be good.


crap, i gave up smoking and now i'm an iced coffee addict.


i'll get back to you tomorrow morning and see how it goes.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

my hips don't lie aka my first ever dance lessons

i am rhythmically challenged. my arms and feet are not friends at all. since a wee urchin i was what you called "matigas ang katawan" (stiff-bodied ; graceless). in many family gatherings where the little kids are forced to do a song/dance number in front of relatives from other cities, i would always do the song number. the evil twins, charry and jocel would always do the dance number. charry and raissa took hawaiian dancing lessons. i took naps. i just can't seem to follow any beat or rhythm. but carry a tune i can.

and so during my teenage years, in dance parties, i would join the other girls who would incubate chairs. or as amy puts it, we "chair danced."
even during my vacation with my high school girlfriends this year i didn't really join them in the dancing. too shy. too awkward.

but i wish i can dance.

i do. at home while i clean up my apartment.
i do dance, in my car.

lately, i've been listening to a lot of upbeat ear candy songs and just go nuts in my living room.

my moves? maybe something similar to an epileptic seizure. or variations of head banging.

and so when the opportunity came to learn a new "skill" i jumped at the idea of learning how to dance.

belly dance.

woo-hoo

i have belly and i wanna dance, so i will belly dance.

armed with my fuschia hip scarf with three layers of bells, i went to the venue and hoped for the best.


man, i had a blast! my teacher is gorgeous, very patient and very very encouraging. there were about 10 ladies in the class and we all had a great time throwing our hips in all directions. waving our hands and turning our heads from side to side. i feel like a pantene girl and sure am glad my hair is long. there's something very sexy about the music and the dance.

wow, ang haba ng hair ko!!!


i can't wait for lesson # 2!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

movie date weekend

i have a huge crush on will smith, so when hancock opened last week i made to see it. i spent the 4th of july weekend with Z and i persuaded him to see hancock with me. Z likes documentaries, old western movies and mostly true to life stories so superhero flicks aren't exactly his choice. because i didn't make him see iron man and the hulk, (two movies i have not seen yet) he went with me.

and he slept through most of the movie. poor guy was exhausted from work.

but i was all bug-eyed watching hancock.

tee-hee.

the next day was Z's movie day. we went to whales and dolphins on IMAX 3D.

now i am SO not a marine animal fan.

but, you know, returning the favor, i went with him.

and put on the dorky 3D glasses which would not stay put on my face because i have a non-nose.

i was terrified of the 3D effects, especially when the orcas supposedly came near us.

fortunately, a 3 year old boy' s cries muffled my own little scare-dy cat scream....

we are so watching the dark knight on IMAX.

i wonder which animal kingdom i'll watch on the screen in exchange for this superhero movie date?

birds?




Sunday, June 29, 2008

the rainbow came first, then the rain...

it's gay pride time!!!

this is year two of me volunteering for Heritage of Pride. i got up the usual time and made it to NYC by 8:00 am. i thought i was late, but the truck with our supplies wasn't there yet. friends from last year were there. greg and ronald were present. our task is to make six rainbow balloon arches. they're very pretty, but quite tough to make. i was the speedy glue girl this morning. my job was to squirt a drop of glue into the balloon before they get inflated to hold the helium in. then the balloons are handed to the "tie-ers" who secure each pair of balloons to the fishing line.


this year i was promoted as balloon guide and made the newbies hold the balloons during the first part of the march. my job was to yell when we are about to go through a traffic light or trees or what not.

it was scorching hot most of the morning and i'm pretty much baked again.

but oh bo by george! the heavens opened and decided to give us all a shower. meanwhile, the balloon brigade had to march about 8 more blocks to "park" the rainbow arches. it was wet t-shirt contest. greg beat me to it because he was wearing two ginormous size 40 FF cup helium filled chi-chis. mine are 100% organic and made in the philippines, bwa-ha. as were muttering expletives under our breaths under the rain, people kept cheering us on.

wow, feeling artista.

next year we are celebrating 20 years of the parade. they said we will make 20 arches instead of six.

bring it on...

a special shout out to my friends, professors, brods and sisses gay and straight alike. mabuhey!!!

happy pride everyone!

from your fag hag in jersey

jane


Thursday, June 26, 2008

i heart my nj frens

i just got home from a fairly busy day today, and the title of this post tells it all.

i hung out with bespren and bespren's other bespren kim. their kids, jonah and hollie were with them. kim wants a girl's night out soon. charly suggested we go to a tranny resto in the city. kim wants to go dancing. me? i dunno, but it sounds like fun.

after lunch i went back with charly to their place to hang out. played with jonah for a bit. jonah is so adorable. he talks a lot now. i love how he calls me "daffin, daffin."

i went for a two hour walk with cleo, a fairly new friend i met at the middle school. she is very sweet, smart and funny. i had a lot of fun talking and walking with her. in a couple of weeks cleo will be my partner in crime when we attempt to bust some moves in belly dancing class. tee-hee.

i found out that i left my wallet at charly's place so i went back to their house. i hung out with matt, charly's husband and like a brother in law to me. i told him my desire to play paintball fight this summer and he is excited about it. me and slim have seen a brochure for a famous skirmish place in PA so we thought it would be fun to go and play. i've always wanted to do paintball fight. i hope we go. i hope we go. i hope we go. i hope we go. i hope we go. i hope we go.


i went home feeling very pleased and blessed at having so many friends to share time with. and charly has made an observation that i am an antisocial butterfly of some sort. she's right because i don't really appear to be little miss sunshine. in fact i have low tolerance with a lot of people, but it seems that i make new friends wherever i go. it is indeed a blessing to have friends like mine.

happy happy joy joy.

the icing on the cake is a missed call from slim from my house phone.

aw shucks, i sound like a freakin' lovesick teenager.

bah.

home again, naturally

my little trip down the shore was cut a day early. i got bored there being by myself waiting for Z to finish work. i can get a bit bratty sometimes when it gets to me that not everybody share the same teacher sched as i do. i also think we just had our first little spat. bratty pinay vs. serious czech. but all is good. i miss slim already.

i left 5:45 am yesterday thinking that i'll be home by 8:30 at the latest. 65 miles into the trip i got stuck in the parkway due to a major accident that left me paralyzed with hundreds of other motorists. this delayed me for 1 1/2 hours. what a nightmare for me and and my overactive bladder.

thank goodness for my cell phone and funny friends who kept me company.

the rest of the morning i slept of killer cramps.

i woke up in between to watch a bit of tv (yey! i got cable back!!!)

went to visit my friend cleo to do some walking/talking.

i look around my apartment and assess the chaos here. i turn my head towards the window and take a deep sigh. chaos my eye, i'll get around to it when i want to. this is one of the things i like about living alone.

Monday, June 23, 2008

This is more like it....

one whole week without work. a monday without having to worry about school. and a few days of the sun and the beach.

as a mountain girl,i was never really attracted to the beach. well, i think viewing orca the killer whale at age four might have something more to do with it than anything, but i never really got any desire to hang out by the beach when i was in my teens or twenties.

i never really took an interest in the beach until this year when my girlfriends and i had a weekend beach getaway.

the ironic thing is, i have found a new interest in beaches now that i am living here in the states.

hayluvit.

i'm spending a few days "downdashore" with Z, me messing up with his work schedule to squeeze some date time. yesterday we took a long leisurely stroll at the boardwalk after lunch to burn all the ribs and chicken we ate, bwehe.

today, i think, we will see the dolphins. if not, we shall visit a local vineyard or a nearby farm to pick strawberries.

and tomorow, i was promised a ride a with jack, so yey for that.

Friday, June 20, 2008

friday night with the foleys

i met up with good friend and college sis Sandy after two years. i had no idea she was so close to me and that her plans of studying her pushed through. not that i doubted that she would have a hard getting into NYU anyway. it was a sweet reunion punctuated by her signature "aww, ay punyeta!" many of my gurgling laughter.

Smart,talented, funny and very very hard core sincere person,Sandy is one of those girlfriends who always gives you a dose of happiness and contentment without even trying. it's always a pleasant experience hanging out with her.

I visited their very neat, organized and relaxing home in the upper west side. she insisted i used their bathroom because she labored the entire morning to clean it up for my benefit. tee-hee. i remarked at how well-kept their apartment looked and Eric said when he got home and noticed that Sandy cleaned up, it seemed like his mom was paying them a visit. i told Sandy her work of love just put my apartment to shame. my home looks like our org house in catalan compound circa mid 90s.


We had dinner at their fave thai resto. dinner was delish! thanks guys. After dinner Sandy and i grabbed a cup of joe and proceeded to the campus of Columbia University.

Wowness.

Columbia U's campus was breathtaking. Sandy and I luaghed hysterically when I noted that it seemed like we were in UPLB humanities steps all over again. We chose a spot on the grass and we concurred that it was our version of hanging out at baker field. what made it even complete was the occasional rounds of the campus security, to which i said to Sandy, "uy, pigoy!"

And so, in a couple of hours, we tried the cram two years worth of catching up, mostly on my stories because Sandy insisted on that first. I'll get her next time.

on a bit of a sad note, the Foleys are off to a European adventure in the next two years. Sigh. And i only caught up with them now.

Sad as i may, i know Sandy and I will always keep in touch.

After coffee, I took a cab back to the bus terminal and went home.

Meeting up with the foleys was a great heartwarming experience. it always makes me feel happy to see my friends find love, joy and contentment with another person. sandy and eric are perfect for each other. and no, i did not get paid for writing this.

so sandy, if you are reading this, when's our next date?




Wednesday, June 18, 2008

the day after

music : cruise control by mariah carey


and so it goes, i spent my first two days being 32 and it was ... oh well A-okay. i went to work as usual yesterday. most of the kids didn't show up in class, a few said their greetings. a few scored some candy. we saw some of the last few scenes of "freedom writers."

did some paperwork then headed home. Z made it to my place 10 minutes after. we had lunch at bennie's, my fave middle eastern resto in our neighborhood. shawarma time! got back home, dressed up for church and got in the bus to the city.

the service was excellent. a guest pastor, pastor gary wilkerson graced the occassion. he was very funny. i felt very fulfilled mass. 'm glad they had a tuesday service and even more glad that my birthday fell on a tuesday this year.

then it was home again.

today we had brunch with charly. i was excited and nervous because this is the first real meeting between ze bespren and ze boypren. of course i wanted moonshine to meet Z and tell me what she thinks of him and give me some sort of analysis. i was nervous because Z is a bit shy and moonshine can also be a bit shy sometimes.

but brunch was perfect. charly seemed comfortable talking with Z and Z was his usual smiling , eye-rolling self. i left the two a couple of times for my requisite pee breaks and everytime i came back they were both talking.

to the park we went after brunch to take jack for a spin. well, technically for my biking lessons.

success, ladies and gents! i was able to pedal jack around. i was properly geared thanks to my safety-conscious instructor who insisted that i wear a helmet even though i looked like the green goblin's sidekick or a praying mantis (richard's observation). biking teacher also wanted me to wear knee pads. good thing my local target didn't sell those, tee-hee. anyway, i am still a bit panicky around other cyclists and it seemed that i have an abnormal predisposition to crash into oncoming cyclists so i am supposed to take a couple more lessons before i can take jack on the streets.

wish me luck on conquering my fear of speed and panic attacks in the company of other cyclists.


post brunch review (three hours later via phone) the moonshine likes czech boy and gives him the thumbs up. and jane is very very happy.






Monday, June 16, 2008

sa letrang N (today is brought to you by the letter N)

that's it folks. In the exciting game of BINGO my age can no longer be included within the limits and bounds of the letter I.

i am officially within the number family of the letter N.

gaahhh.

today i turned 32.

bow.


and today for the first time in 11 years, i am going to work because i want to say a proper farewell to my kids. thank goodness for half days.

i do not know what today and the rest of being 32 will bring. but whatever they may be, i know God's got my back. always did.

i would like to post a shout out to my MD friends lubs, nikki, ron and vince for celebrating with me last year. i am so thankful for your company and for your love.

bahama mamas. thanks for an unforgettable cruise.

my jersey/texas family charly, karen, christina and richard it is a blessing to ba a part of your lives.

thanks to all my family and friends who have been there.. always.

a simple lunch, a simple mass and a quiet dinner are what i hope for today.

and tomorrow.... i ride the bike.

yipee ya yey.







Saturday, June 14, 2008

(hopefully) new adventures

the other night, i went out with my librarian friend lynn to finally catch up on things. we had a cup of coffee at the newly opened neighborhood bakery. i ordered and tasted my first ever red velvet cake.

i didn't like it.

give me mernel's chocolate cake anytime.

or cappucino's tiramisu.

i found out that lynn takes belly dancing classes at the community high school. i was interested of course.

never mind that my arms and legs are not friends. the only time these two work in harmony is when i played basketball in high school and college.

never mind that i really can't dance. amy has a term for what we do. we chair dance. never mind that my body is not pliable nor graceful at all.

so anyway, i went to lynn's class to inquire for a possible spot in the summer session which starts in july 10. it's a one hour once a week class for six weeks. i'm excited. i did warm my gorgeous teacher that i can't dance. she laughed and told me she'll have me grooving in no time.

i asked my good friend cleo to join me, she's as excited as i am...


my next adventure involves a new younger guy.

jack.

jack is my new 24" magna mountain bike.


i don't want to take a picture of him yet because as usual, my apartment's a mess. but he's actually colored lilac. Z and I bought jack at his local target store. jack has been gathering dust in my living room because Z made me promise to wait for him so i can have my lessons again. he's scared i might hurt myself. awww, sweet right? the bad girl in me wants to take jack out for a ride, but the idea of a scraped knee or a mild concussion has stopped me enough. soft.


the plan is to get me on the bike so i can ride to summer camp as much as i can. wow, pretty tall order considering my camp is on the hill. good luck.

i'll tell you how the biking lessons go.

i'll be a year older in two days.

man.


Wednesday, June 11, 2008

just another day in the edd box

it is an understatement to say that it is a tough job to teach special ed kids. most of special ed kids are seen as trouble makers. it takes a lot of will and heart to begin and finish each school day with one's sanity intact.

there had been days when i was this close to tears; tears of frustration at how unkind my kids can be to each other. their unkindness towards me, i have learned to understand, but sometimes i have my weak moments.

part of being a special ed teacher is attending team meetings to discuss each student's educational plans and recommendations for the next school year. this morning, i attended one such meeting and the student is one of my first period boys, who we will call speedy.

unfortunately, the reports from the psychologist and other teachers were not very rosy. speedy still needs to work harder on his work and study habits.speedy has ADHD. he is a few years behind in terms of reading and comprehension skills. and as much as i recognize his excellent effort in class, i do not think it will be for his best interest to join a mainstream class next year.

i sat beside speedy as we listened to various reports and test results. i saw his jaw tensed. his eyes were a bit teary, i know from anger. i knew it hurt him to hear these reports, but he has to know and he needs to address them, with our help of course. for a moment there, i wanted to hold his hand and tell him he's going to be okay. i felt sad for him. in a way i felt i also failed him.


as sad as i was, i felt so blessed to be a teacher to these kids. some teachers and students misunderstand them most of the time, sometimes even i do not understand them. one thing i know though, i have a job to do here in high school special ed english. and even though my kids drive me crazy, there are days when all the bad things that happen in class can disappear from my mind.


here's a new "hallmark" moment ...

after that meeting, i had a class. freshman english. B1 and B2 are always late. always. for a class of 5 kids, missing 2 by the final bell is very noticeable. in short, i've had it with these two. of course they made a scene. B1, who i know likes me as a teacher suddenly turned nasty to me. exasperated as i was, i tried not to make a scene in the hallway as i told them to get out of the classroom and go with me to the dean's office. a couple of my sophomores, comedy, grumpy and flappy, who of course were hanging out in the hallways, came to my rescue and told off B1 and B2.

comedy : yo, why you talkin' to my teacher like that yo?!
grumpy : you guys better start treatin' her right before we @*&$ you up!
comedy : stop doing that!
flappy : why are you guys always giving her a hard time?

(slightly embarrassed to be told off by their older "brothers" in the edd box, B1 and B2 lumbered out of the classroom, muttering in resignation)

and these three are the same three who sometimes claim they hate me or they hate my class.

sigh.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

it's getting hot in hurrr

this is day two of half day school days for us here in northeastern
jersey. schools have opted to have abbreviated school days because
of the extreme heat. it makes me kinda giggle a couple of times
thinking maybe we're preserving what little brain cells we have left
before they melt.

meanwhile, clothes in my high school seem to get shorter, tighter, and
tinier to the point of covering nothing,much to the delight of my
boys. the hallways in my floor literally become catwalks of some sort
as the boys position themselves against the walls as they look at the
mostly skimpily clad girls sashay their way to homeroom, the girls'
restroom or lockers. they even have a point system for the girls.

the little prude in me just shakes her head and shrugs her shoulders.
what do you do? the kids of today...

but it is funny to note that even though my my boys are just like any
normal testosteroni teens, who oggle at girls who wear clothes that
leave very little to their wild imagination, they tell
me that they would not want their girlfriends to dress like hookers.
they want their girls to look decent. ha...

anyway,

here i am complaining about the sweltering heat and the AC not running
cold enough. shame shame shame on me tropical island gal. i'm
thinking of running a cold bath complete with ice cubes,coconut
scented bubbles.. and instead of the rubber ducky, maybe two or three of my action figures. ahhh the works.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

jenny lewis and popelka

i meant to post last night, but i was so exhausted from gym, i almost fell asleep talking to Z. here is a mish mash of the happenings past and not so distant past.
so on sunday, amy crossed the hudson to visit ma hood. i took the day off and we basically just vegged out the morning into afternoon. we went back to the city to catch rilo kiley in concert at level 5. too bad like cinderella, i had to be home at a certain time before my nj transit bus turns into a gigantic pumpkin. i enjoyed half and hour of live rilo kiley though. jenny lewis is such a rockstar. we love her.

three wishes for cinderella

speaking of cinderella, i rented a czech cinderella film. it's an old movie, released in 1973. instead of a fairy godmother. popelka had the help of her pet owl rosie, and three magical hazelnuts to give her a fabulous hunting outfit, a gorgeous attire w/ the satin shoes for the ball and wedding dress. what i love about this version is popelka is a kick ass cinderella. she's some sort of tomboy who intrigued the prince because she was such an excellent marksman and a graceful equestrian.she's not this blushing, bumbling, giggly girl who was so stupid as to leave her shoe by the palace steps. if that was me... que horror! i will not leave my shoe alone... nevah!



Monday, June 2, 2008

welcome june!

i just came back from my morning workout at curves. i am nursing a cup of coffee as i wait for amy to wake up.

yesterday, we went to costco to pick up a few things for her to take home. i got my supply of soymilk, carrot juice and this naked green concoction that's supposed to be very good for you.

after costco i drove to white castle to introduce their soft square burgers to amy's palate. we were giggling as we pulled into the parking lot. harold and kumar? nah, it's jane and pilar go to white castle.

we head back to the apartment and went to a nearby county park to just sit in the grass, reminiscent of baker field, but not quite. talk. talk. talk.

dinner was garlic rice with sisig from tocino grill.

another talk marathon.

tonight we will see rilo kiley in the city.

weeeeeee.

(oh, i took a mental health day today, tee-hee)

Sunday, June 1, 2008

another sunday morning

background music : middle of my life by sun 60

it has been a quiet weekend. mostly boring, but the calm and idleness is well-deserved given tomorrow will be the start of another school week.

our high school students are becoming more and more restless. more fights. more kids being sent to detention. less work from them, ladidadida.

yesterday afternoon i watched the film coach carter. it's one of those inspiring films. i got a bit teary eyed at one point. somehow the players on that basketball team reminded me of some of my students in our school basketball team. if only i can inspire and change them coach carter style.


chocnut and s both called me while i was at target yesterday. i feel comforted that given the latest news about work, they both encouraged me to move forward and give this teaching position for another year.

there must be reason why they want me to stay.

and as always, i look up to the sky and say "i don't know why, but i know You got my back on this."


it's june already. like my kids i am countind down the days 'til school is officially over.

tomorrow, my brother JP will celebrate his 31st birthday.

and pretty soon, i'll be 32.

maaaan.


Saturday, May 31, 2008

in a pickle

background music : should i stay or should i go by the ramones


"don't be too good up there, they might not want to let you go."

i laughed off my former boss's remark and said, "yeah, right."

boy i did not know those words would be prophetic.

i found out yesterday that although there is a place for me back in my "home." the family in my new home are not really happy to let me go.

wow. in a way i feel loved.

so now i am in a quandary, hence the title of this post.

honestly i do not know what i am going to do. the hard-headed idealist in me wants to go back to my old home and get back to work. real hard work. back to 60 or more students. migraine-inducing checking of papers, hormonal pre-teens. and sometimes annoying parents. back to my color coded lesson plans, back to stand up comedy, back to stern li'l ol me who demands a student's shoe if he/she did not bring a pen to class and has to borrow from my stash. back to line writing when a student as much as say "shut up" in class.

the work in my new home is not bad at all. certainly easier, but a lot more stress dealing with special ed students. don't get me wrong, i love my students, especially my period 1 and 2 classes. but i yearn to teach and perform in class. i don't get to do that. it seems my primary job is to contain my students everyday for 50 minutes and prevent them from beating up each other.


of course i can always assert my preference to teach in my old home, but with the way things have been, me resigning and getting myself back in the fold, i guess i better play it by ear.

di na bale, survivor naman tayo.

ay mali, di pala survivor, winner, ateh!




Friday, May 30, 2008

a lesson on dating vocabulary

my first period class are all boys. they're a great bunch. they come in, they sit. they work. everyone's happy. in between work we talk about , oh stuff. the other day they were talking about, oh girls. and then for some reason the conversation got to lil ol' me. they found out that i live by myself.




student 1 : but why?

me : because.

student 1 : BUT WHY? are you single?

me : oh, i've been married before

the rest just shrugged and someone else said " oh, i was about to say... you can't be single all this time..."



back to today. in one of our read and talk mornings, the subject went to the shore.

student 2 says he can't wait to to go down the shore so he can watch girls. i told him there weren't a lot of girls yet on the boardwalk.



student 2 : how do you know?

me : because.

student 2 : HOW?

me : because i'm down the shore most weekends.

others: why?

me : (oops) uhm, (in my faintest voice possible) my boyfriend lives there?





commotion.

student 1 : but you said yesterday that you were single.

me : i am.

student 2 : yo, miss you can't be single and have a boyfriend.

me : why not?

student 1 : you're just not. why do you say you are single?

me : uhm, because i'm not married and i live by myself.

student 3 : that just means you're independent.

me: okay...

student 1 : you're not single.

me: okay.

student 1 : do you like him?

me : duh, i guess so.

student 3 : miss then you are not single.

me : alright.

student : you're not, okay?

me : OKAY. grrr.





gee, this is more annoying than friendster's : "it's complicated."





btw : i am blogging this from my classroom. sigh. why is it not 3 pm yet?

jane tamad

something's wrong with me.

since i got back from da shore, all i do after work is eat and sleep. i sleep at around 4pm and wake up the next morning, feeling hung over. no, no alchohol involved. my wine bottles and pilsner bottles are all untouched.

yesterday was the worst, after my afternoon lunch/dinner i lay down to read and when i woke up it was already 4:30.

ayayay.

i need jolt cola.




Monday, May 26, 2008

weekend round up

tandem biking was very enjoyable since i pretty much didn't do anything but sit on my ass and enjoy the ride. it was a beautiful sunday morning yesterday and we took full advantage of the weather to spend outdoors.

so the question is, did i learn how to ride the bike?

hmmm, not yet, but almost there.

after tandem biking for almost an hour on the boardwalk, we exchanged the tandem with a regular bike for my lessons

you see virginia, i am a very bratty student. luckily my instructor was very very patient with me.

Z : (excited) very good, you are doing it already.

me : ssshhhh. don't cheer me on. please be quiet.
Z : okay

after 1 1/2 hours of demo and attempts at making at least 20 meters of pedaling i said that's enough lesson for now.

Z agreed that it was enough for the first lesson.

yes virginia, i apologized for being a brat, and yes i've been nice since.


the rest of the afternoon we spent just hanging out and exchanging childhood stories.

i drove out at 5:30 am and got home by 8 today.


today, i met up with amy and pj. we went around soho for a little shopping and then had a quiet lunch at a neighborhood pub.





did some walking and talking. caught up wit amy. checked out some shops. went to sephora. noo-ni-noo-ni-noo. here's a picture with amyamy and i are sched to watch rilo kiley next week. yipee!oh.tomorrow is tuesday.back to work.sigh.

Friday, May 23, 2008

not giving in

it feels like almost a month that i've decided to kick the habit. well virginia, bad habit kicked me right back.

hard.

accordig to Z's handy-dandy hi-tech-i-have -no-idea-how-to-operate-this-thing-with-too-many-functions since i weighed last december 24, i gained 3.98 lbs. the only good news is that m body fat then was 41% and now it is down to 35.1%.

if anything, i have noticed that i can jog for longer periods now.i used to jog 1/2 a block and almost faint to exhaustion (like my lungs will explode). thesae days i can jog three full blocks easy peasy. fresh breath and clearer skin.

and to make sure i don't balloon back to my old self. i intend to:

1. stay away from the filipino bakery to stop any impulse to to buy pandan mamon.

2. tell Z not to let me buy tiramisu everytime we pass by their local pastry shop.

3. walk for at least 15 minutes after my afternoon meal.

4. walk/jog to and from curves every moning (yes, all five mornings of the workweek)

5. always keep a pack of sugarless gum handy.

we plan to take advantage of the sunny weather and finally get me on a bike today.

i'll take a leisurely jog at the boardwalk in an hour.

enjoy your memorial day weekend!