durga, la conquistadora

background music : yummy by gwen stefani



after three months of camping out in my living room couch, i have finally reclaimed the bedroom.
(applause, applause) in my best elvis presley voice "thank you very much"



right after the dissolution of my marriage, sleeping was optional for me. my mind was too preoccupied with booting, rebooting, deleting and reprocessing painful information to even have the time to add sleep to its overworked playlist.

i drank wine to make me fall asleep. i even took some over the counter sleep aid just so i can get some shut eye so i can make it through work somehow semi-normal. i slept in the couch which was a bit uncomfortable, really.

i stayed out of the bedroom not because it reminded me of impassioned or otherwise coitus with the ex. the bedroom did not haunt me like that. it was the empty space and the resounding silence in the room that unsettled me. i used my bed as a dump site for laundry that needed to be folded, i used the bedroom as my closet.

the past couple of weeks i had a major change of heart and mind. as if roused from an emotional coma, my old self bounced back blinked her eyes and said "screw it, shit happens, what are you gonna do?"

and so i retraced my steps into the room that i feared most. i sat by the bed and felt its comfortable softness. i lay down and stared at the ceiling for what seemed like hours. i mused at the possibilities of having the bed to myself. i don't have to worry about space. i can leave as many books as i want. i can hog all the pillows. ahhh, it's so not bad after all.

durga, victorious once more, has reclaimed the bedroom and declared it as a sanctuary for peaceful slumber and fantastic dreams.

if only the couple upstairs can keep their boinking down, it would be perfect.